R

 easonable people don't make this noise, urjaisdjf**4$%%{}[[))#@ (and neither do most unreasonable ones). The weather is urjaisdjf**4$%%{}[[))#@ for lack of a better noise, I mean word.

 R's report card. I've got R spirit. R just rolls into school and gets moving. No visual similarities to any other letters or between its uppercase and lowercase, a completely unique and rolling sound, I just get carried away. I will go in the R spirit and say that their grade is an A!

The letter ladle, The r just rolls on to the mouth. I eat r after r after r after r... Whoops! I got carried away. The r is smooth, and its texture is so distinctive that it stays in your mouth. Its the same with the taste. It is sweet n' salty and it just sticks in your mouth after you're done. I would say that this is, overall, an energizing letter that makes me want to rrrrrrrrrrrruuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnn...

R's playground, ...nnnnnnnnnnn right into the playground. Zooooooom! I finish a lap. Hello by the way, I'm R. I'm here to show you a racing good time. Get your heart racing. I want to go......tell......you.....how... ...fast......I......am. See? I'm so fast that I can almost talk to you normally while running laps around the playground. Want to see real speed? I'll ZOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...

A note of worship, ...OOOOOOOOOOOM OVER TO THE WORSHIP. Oh R, we all love you a lot. O. K. The talking bit is done now let's set up the sacrifice. Now! |-|_^_|-| O. K., that's done. Now move it people! It's time to run laps.